隨著2019級新生的入學，哈佛大學的校報The Harvard Crimson（《哈佛深紅報》）評選出了10篇新生的優秀文書作品，并附上了相應的評析。
（官網截圖）
在所有申請者都和你一樣擁有著絕佳的GPA/SAT成績的時候，如何用精彩優秀的文書脫穎而出會是很讓人頭疼的問題。對于正在苦惱文書寫作的同學，這些優秀文書范例就是參考答案般的存在了。小站君將會搬運全部10篇文書范文和評析，請各位正在準備留學申請的同學持續關注哦~
作者：Bobby 加州華裔
性別：男
GPA：4.0/4.0
SAT：2300（閱讀750，數學750，寫作800）
SAT II：數學Level 2，生物 生態學/分子生物學，文學
課外活動：非營利組織負責人、學生報刊主編、文學雜志高級編輯、藝術總監、校棒球隊成員
獲獎情況：威廉姆斯圖書獎、國家獎學金獲得者、AP杰出學生、學術藝術和寫作獎地區金鑰匙獲得者
Essay正文
Bold white rafters ran overhead, bearing upon their great iron shoulders the weight of the skylight above. Late evening rays streamed through these sprawling glass panes, casting a gentle glow upon all that they graced—paper and canvases and paintbrushes alike. As day became night, the soft luminescence of the art studio gave way to a fluorescent glare, defining the clean rectilinear lines of Dillon Art Center against the encroaching darkness. It was a studio like no other. Modern. Sophisticated. Professional.
And it was clean and white and nice.
But it just wasn't .
Because to me, there was >—myself included—sat around these tables with easels, in whatever space the limited confines of the studio allowed. The instructor sometimes talked, and we sometimes listened. Most of the time, though, it was just us—children, drawing and talking and laughing and sweating in the cluttered and overheated mess of an art studio.
No, it was not so clean and not so white and not so nice. But I have drawn—rather, lived—in this studio for most of my past ten years. I suppose this is strange, as the rest of my life can best be characterized by everything the studio is not: cleanliness and order and structure. But then again, the studio was like nothing else in my life, beyond anything in which I've ever felt comfortable or at ease.
Sure, I was frustrated at first. My carefully composed sketchbooks—the proportions just right, the contrast perfected, the whiteness of the background meticulously preserved—were often marred by the frenzied strokes of my instructor's charcoal as he tried to teach me not to draw accurately, but passionately. I hated it. But thus was the fundamental gap in my artistic understanding—the difference between the surface realities that I wanted to depict, and the profound though elusive truths of the human condition that art could explore. It was the difference between drawing a man's face and using abstraction to explore his soul.
But thus was the fundamental gap in my artistic understanding—the difference between the surface realities that I wanted to depict, and the profound though elusive truths of the human condition that art could explore.
And I can't tell you exactly when or why my attitude changed, but eventually my own lines began to unabashedly disregard the rules of depth or tonality to which I had >—a realm in which I was neither experienced nor comfortable. Apart from surface manifestations altogether, this realm was simultaneously >
Indeed, it was the realm of disorder and messy studios and true art—a place where I could express the world like I saw it, in colors and strokes unrestrained by expectations or rules; a place where I could find refuge in the contours of my own chaotic lines; a place that was neither beautiful nor ideal, but real.
No, it was not so clean and not so white and not so nice.
But then again, neither is art.
深紅報評析
這篇文章最突出的特點就是對意象的靈活應用。開頭Bobby就用意象將讀者引入文章。比如：“Late evening rays [...] casting a gentle glow” and “the soft luminescence of the art studio” becoming “a fluorescent glare.”這樣的句子，讀者一看就知道這篇文章是關于藝術的。盡管如此，開頭還是有很多細節被有意地遺漏了。讀者們苦苦搜尋細節，只為了補全Bobby描述的意象畫面。其余部分，鮑比對意象的運用使他的文章栩栩如生，black fingerprints and smudges和unsoiled whiteness被用來描述他的藝術。他還用意象來說明他有組織、有類型的人物角色和他最終創造的抽象藝術之間的對比。其中一個例子是他素描本上精心設計的留白被導師炭筆瘋狂的筆觸所破壞。
然而，意象本身并不能提供文章中那種具體而有力的敘述。這篇文章最具吸引力之一的地方是，它代表了一個成長的故事，與成長小說的亞流派相呼應。在成長小說中，人物在心理上從青年期進化到成年期。事實上，這篇文章不僅記錄了Bobby從兒童到青年的發展歷程，Bobby的藝術創作也從有序的、膚淺的東西走向了抽象的、有深刻意義的東西。
然而，Bobby的文章和一個單純寫得很好的故事的區別是，它為讀者提供了一種潛臺詞式的敘述。雖然從表面上看，Bobby的文章探討了他的藝術的抽象性與他的生活秩序之間的對比，但同時它也反映了藝術本身的歷史。就像以前的Bobby在他的速寫本中the proportions just right, the contrast perfected“比例恰到好處，對比完美無缺”一樣，文藝復興時期的畫家們也不知疲倦地努力掌握透視法——使藝術看起來盡可能真實。正如現在的Bobby的“lines began to unabashedly disregard the rules of depth or tonality”“線條開始肆無忌憚地無視深度或調性的規則”一樣，藝術慢慢的發展也是這樣——從莫奈印象派的光線處理，到畢加索立體主義的方臉和波洛克表現主義的完全抽象——藝術不是作品多貼近真實，而是傳遞出來的信息。用Bobby的話說，“It was the difference between drawing a man's face and using abstraction to explore his soul.”“這是畫一個男人的臉和用抽象的方式探索他的靈魂之間的區別。
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